Blue-Rings are Like London Buses

If, like me, you have no life and read this blog regularly, you will have spotted that I often quote Dr Samuel Johnson’s famous phrase, “If a Man is tired of London, he is tired of life”. Not because I think Dr Johnson was right. In fact quite the opposite: Dr Johnson was bonkers – 10 minutes in London and I have lost the will to live. But 10 minutes in KBR? (or Paris, Istanbul, Sydney, Rome, Manchester)  Life: bring it on – I want more of that!

So, let’s now fast forward a bit more…… you may have read that I have been teased by my Beloved Colleagues over the fact that I never saw a blue-ring octopus. Believe me, the laughter has rung in my ears a number of times when the boats come back to the jetty with yells of “Tell Tim: another blue-ring”. And, as they say in the Bible, verily There came from the Dive Manager’s Office a wailing and gnashing of teeth.

So, “duck” (Note: cricket term for zero) broken the other day, I saw not one but two Blue Rings on the Critter Hunt dive site. Yay! But, get this, the following dive I came across another one! Not only did I “come across” him (her? how do you sex a blue-ring? Would you want to?) after a couple of photos Brer Blue Ring started jetting towards me. Quickly. Dear Reader, remember that these rascals carry enough neuro-toxin to kill half of Bangladesh at a blink. So, did I hang around and watch our friend jet towards me? Well, what do you think? Nope. I did not survive 35 years as a diplomat without a finally honed survival instinct (some of those corridors of power are lethal). I bugged out quickly. And, yes, I kept looking over my shoulder just to make sure I was ahead of the pack.

Wow. So, Dr Johnson, “if a Man Is tired of London, he is tired of Life”. Let me quote another London saying back to you: “there’s never a bus when you want one. But when it does arrive, there will be two…..”

Blue-rings are like London buses : never around when you want one – but then two come at the same time…… and sometimes they might chase you.